When I was eighteen, I studied in Paris and lived at the Cité Universitaire where I met my French boyfriend, Daniel. Sometimes we’d reverse roles to dress up and go out to gender-bender clubs and dance. My hair was so short I looked like a boy – and it was fun to kiss Daniel looking beautiful in his eye shadow, lipstick, stockings, and heels! I’m grateful for the relaxed playfulness we enjoyed as curious teenagers. Our explorations were a light-hearted, sexy rebellion against society’s expectations of the stereotypical gender binary – over 50 years ago. The people we danced with in those clubs embodied many different ways to live and love.
Those adventures were a source of power and pleasure, teaching me to embrace the whole of our humanity, in kinship and joy. As long as our life continues, we can be lovers, making love with this present moment, exploring all its rough & tumble and play, offering our creative gifts and love to ourselves, each other, our families, and our planet. We can fall in love anytime we’re fully present! As Dr. Cheryl Fraser says, “Falling in love is easy. Staying in love takes mindfulness.” Mindfulness and compassion, giving ourselves and each other the benefit of the doubt, forgiving missteps. We can come home to this radiant possibility every day.
It is a gift to be alive, to be in relationship with life in the form of you, me, us, with reverence for all life. Mindfulness is relationship, all we are is a field of relationship – to this moment, to NOW, to the world that is so much greater than ourselves. Through staying open in love and expressing our love in action, we can transform ourselves into something greater than ego or gender. Never has our meditation practice been more needed to stay in love and trust the ultimate goodness of humanity.
PS – You can join Dr. Cheryl Fraser this weekend, exploring Mindfulness, Love, and Sex