Insights of a Peacock: A Note From Christiane Wolf

This last week I again had the great pleasure and honor to teach a silent retreat in Germany, this time in Bavaria. Fifty brave souls, about a third of them new to retreat practice, showed up. Many of them secular mindfulness teachers or aspiring teachers. The place was magical: A medieval castle on top of a hill, first mentioned in local scriptures in the 12th century, surrounded by a big landscaped park with faux romantic ruins, perfect for walking meditation and reflections on nature.

Two male peacocks, one in natural colors and one white, watched our every move and commented the bell ringing with their cries. We decided that their cat-like “MEOUW-MEOUW!” could also be heard as “NOW- NOW!” What a fitting reminder!

After the first few days when the minds were caught oscillating back and forth between sleepiness and restlessness the repeated daily rhythm and the lack of outer distractions allowed for peacefulness and contentment to arise. Awareness practice became more easeful and kind and allowed for insights to arise, like these:

~We can see how we keep ourselves busy in order not to feel.

~We can see how much we believe that in order to be worthy of love we need to work hard and be perfect.

~We can see how we hold on so strongly to our roles, even on retreat, where many of them are just memories or projections.

~We can see how everything arises and passes away, inside and out, and relax back into this truth that nature shows us everywhere.

And (as Mark Nepo so beautifully describes it) we can have glimpses…

“..into the endless breath

that has no breather,

into the surf that human

shells call God(dess).”

With love and respect,

Christiane Wolf

P.S. Trudy and I are co-leading InsightLA’s 5 night Fall Insight Meditation Residential Retreat. The retreat is being held at the beautiful Royal Way Retreat Center, just a couple hours outside of LA, in Lucerne Valley. Hope you can sit with us!

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